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  • Grace Ehlers

how i handle hate


"Am I now trying to win

the approval of human beings, or of God?

Or am I trying to please people?

If I were still trying to please people,

I would not be a servant of Christ."

Galatians 1:10

I am very fortunate to not have to deal with hate very often. I have a small audience, and so many of you have been more than kind. I have received many messages that always remind me why I do what I do. Please do not take this blog as me over shadowing all of you who have been beyond kind to me. I appreciate all my followers, even the ones who aren’t as nice.

As I said above, the mean comments happen very rarely, but that doesn’t mean they never happen. The hate I get ranges all over the place. Here’s an example of the range “You aren’t very bright, are you?” to taking my words out of context to question my faith and intentions. I believe the ones who send me private messages are actually not trying to be mean, but just come across harsh with their "critique". It’s those that comment under my stuff publicly that I believe have the worst intentions.


I prepared myself for the worst when I started sharing more and more of my life. I was ready for backlash the more I opened up. I was so pleasantly surprised with the minimal amount, but it didn’t stop me from struggling with the not-so-nice comments.


I wish this blog was about how well bad comments fall off my back. That I could say it doesn’t bother me and I move on right away, but that isn’t the case. In fact, I will delete public comments despite the many opinions against doing so. I try to respond to those that ask questions even if they aren’t being nice, but if it only causes arguing, I will delete the comment. I have blocked people. I hate confrontation, and my blogs / social media platforms are supposed to be encouraging. If I find a way to prevent it, I try to keep all the negativity off, even if it’s not much to begin with.


My parents always taught us that if we got hate we were doing something right. It meant we didn’t just go with the wind, and try to please everyone. We were taught that we should worry about pleasing God not everyone in the world. And well, while I believe that to all be true, I struggle hard with being a people pleaser. It makes anxious if I disappoint someone, even if it’s a random person on the internet.


When I do get a comment that doesn’t sit well with me, I stress out immediately, and begin doubting everything. “Maybe, this is my sign to quit.” “What if what they are saying other people believe too?” I just think about it and rethink about it. I am on here to help people, but I struggle with coming to terms with not being able to help that person. In fact, I upset them so much to the point where they had to leave a bad comment.


I have a supportive husband and family. They hate when I get a bad comment, because they know how much they affect me. They will listen to me talk and talk about it. Then, they flood me with reassurance.


Bad comments are not fun, but they are a part of being online. You could be the most perfect person ever, and people would still try to tear you down. I mean look at what happened to Jesus. I will continue to write and deal with the comments. So if you leave a nice comment and I say, “it means a lot”, I mean that. Good comments make this all worth it. No amount of hate could top them. They are the greatest reassurance I need to keep going. I feel blessed to be able to do what I do.


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Thank you so much for taking the time to read my blog! I have another blog page where I post way more frequently on there as well. Check it out @ gracekbianco.medium.com !!


If you have any questions / comments about this blog or any of my other blogs, feel free to reach out. You can message me through the blog, email me, dm me, and/or comment down below. Don’t forget to scroll to the bottom of my website to subscribe to my blog! And as always, you are ALL loved and appreciated!!! <3 <3 <3

PEACE OUT UNTIL NEXT TIME!!!!

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